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Second Coming -> Post here for bad advice (4/11/2008 10:01:25 AM)

Post here and I will make sure you screw up your relationship and ruin your life.



MikeG -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/11/2008 10:22:22 AM)

Dear Mr. Second Coming, how do I get my wife to understand that I need a PS3 and MLB 08 The Show and that our TV must be upgraded to experience the true power of the Blu-Ray?



Second Coming -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/11/2008 11:01:33 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MikeG

Dear Mr. Second Coming, how do I get my wife to understand that I need a PS3 and MLB 08 The Show and that our TV must be upgraded to experience the true power of the Blu-Ray?


Women always trying to hold a man down. It's friday. You get paid today? Just got to the bank and cash the whole thing. What you don't have to cover it put it on a credit card of hers. Go to your favorite electronics store and get you the biggest most expensive plasma flatscreen, a PS3, MLB The Show 08 and throw in a few blu-ray movies while you're at it, and you need a good soundsystem to appreciate it on. Then come screech into the driveway, drive through the grass,tearing up the lawn and run over her flowers  and pull up to the door. Then haul in your plasma and knock over a few vases of hers or anything breakable(a precious moments collection in a showcase would be ideal). Then set it down in the room you plan to set it up in. Ignore her yelling at you and go out and get your sound system, PS3 etc. then come back into the room set it all down. Start taking down pictures of her family, her dolls or whatever she collects and put them in a pile and take them out to the road and throw them in the trash. Come back in and start setting your stuff up. At this point she'll be livid. Then just say "Shut up Bitch, I'm the breadwinner in this family. I'm spending my money on something useful for a change instead of all those "outfits" that you buy and these stupid (insert whatever she collects). I'm tired of looking at picures of your fat mom, it reminds me of what you're going to look like in 20 years.

That should do it.



SaronRosse -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/11/2008 12:11:39 PM)

hmmm 3 bands are playing  in my city (Tonus from germany if any of you have heard about them) and I got a ticket... now I will get there for free as I will be taking pictures for a band... so what should I do with my ticket!!!!
please help meee



Second Coming -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/11/2008 1:15:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SaronRosse

hmmm 3 bands are playing  in my city (Tonus from germany if any of you have heard about them) and I got a ticket... now I will get there for free as I will be taking pictures for a band... so what should I do with my ticket!!!!
please help meee



Go to the worst part of town and offer the ticket to the guy that's talking to himself and has a crazed look in his eye. Then offer to give him a ride to the concert and take backroads to get there. 



Supafly -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/12/2008 12:02:23 AM)

Dear Second Coming,
I'm in a pickle.  Basically, I'm not quite sure how to tell my wife, the love of my life, that I've had a secret crush on an old roommate of mine.  In fact, it's quite odd that these feelings have been resonant all these years, but odder that they've grown in time.  My emotions are so twisted that I do not know what to think and am glad you offered your hand in advice.  That old roommate is the good sir MikeG.  Do I just tell my wife and run off with MikeG?  Or do I need to keep pocketing those emotions and hopefully one day drown them out? 

Confused in LA



Second Coming -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/12/2008 7:49:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Supafly

Dear Second Coming,
I'm in a pickle. Basically, I'm not quite sure how to tell my wife, the love of my life, that I've had a secret crush on an old roommate of mine. In fact, it's quite odd that these feelings have been resonant all these years, but odder that they've grown in time. My emotions are so twisted that I do not know what to think and am glad you offered your hand in advice. That old roommate is the good sir MikeG. Do I just tell my wife and run off with MikeG? Or do I need to keep pocketing those emotions and hopefully one day drown them out?

Confused in LA


Invite Mike's brother over for a romantic evening. Candlelight dinner and the whole nine yards. Be sure to time the lovemaking for when your wife will come home and walk in on you two in her bed.



Supafly -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/13/2008 8:19:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Second Coming

quote:

ORIGINAL: Supafly

Dear Second Coming,
I'm in a pickle. Basically, I'm not quite sure how to tell my wife, the love of my life, that I've had a secret crush on an old roommate of mine. In fact, it's quite odd that these feelings have been resonant all these years, but odder that they've grown in time. My emotions are so twisted that I do not know what to think and am glad you offered your hand in advice. That old roommate is the good sir MikeG. Do I just tell my wife and run off with MikeG? Or do I need to keep pocketing those emotions and hopefully one day drown them out?

Confused in LA


Invite Mike's brother over for a romantic evening. Candlelight dinner and the whole nine yards. Be sure to time the lovemaking for when your wife will come home and walk in on you two in her bed.


Plz re-read.  Where are you getting "brother" from!?



Second Coming -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/14/2008 9:22:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Supafly

quote:

ORIGINAL: Second Coming

quote:

ORIGINAL: Supafly

Dear Second Coming,
I'm in a pickle. Basically, I'm not quite sure how to tell my wife, the love of my life, that I've had a secret crush on an old roommate of mine. In fact, it's quite odd that these feelings have been resonant all these years, but odder that they've grown in time. My emotions are so twisted that I do not know what to think and am glad you offered your hand in advice. That old roommate is the good sir MikeG. Do I just tell my wife and run off with MikeG? Or do I need to keep pocketing those emotions and hopefully one day drown them out?

Confused in LA


Invite Mike's brother over for a romantic evening. Candlelight dinner and the whole nine yards. Be sure to time the lovemaking for when your wife will come home and walk in on you two in her bed.


Plz re-read.  Where are you getting "brother" from!?


I must have mixed up the other thread where you said "Do I just tell my wife and run off with MikeG's brother?"

In that case let me rephrase it:

Invite Mike's brother over for a romantic evening. Candlelight dinner and the whole nine yards. Be sure to time the lovemaking for when your wife will come home and walk in on you two in her bed.



SaronRosse -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/14/2008 10:27:28 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Supafly

Dear Second Coming,
I'm in a pickle.  Basically, I'm not quite sure how to tell my wife, the love of my life, that I've had a secret crush on an old roommate of mine.  In fact, it's quite odd that these feelings have been resonant all these years, but odder that they've grown in time.  My emotions are so twisted that I do not know what to think and am glad you offered your hand in advice.  That old roommate is the good sir MikeG.  Do I just tell my wife and run off with MikeG?  Or do I need to keep pocketing those emotions and hopefully one day drown them out? 

Confused in LA


hahahaha supa [sm=bondage.gif]



Bishop -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/15/2008 2:06:28 PM)

Dear Mr. Second Coming Sir,
I recently discovered that an old roommate of mine (Supa) is in love with the love of my life (MikeG) and/or his brother. I have had these feelings after I shared a bed with both of them in Houston a few years ago (not at the same time, pervs) and it breaks my heart to know that he shares the same feelings for them as do I. I am also in love with Claudia, Johnny, and Meg. How can I choose and how do I approach them? Also, how do I keep from hurting the people that I do not choose (since they are all obviously in love with me)?
Yours truly,
Anonymous



Second Coming -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/15/2008 11:49:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bishop

Dear Mr. Second Coming Sir,
I recently discovered that an old roommate of mine (Supa) is in love with the love of my life (MikeG) and/or his brother. I have had these feelings after I shared a bed with both of them in Houston a few years ago (not at the same time, pervs) and it breaks my heart to know that he shares the same feelings for them as do I. I am also in love with Claudia, Johnny, and Meg. How can I choose and how do I approach them? Also, how do I keep from hurting the people that I do not choose (since they are all obviously in love with me)?
Yours truly,
Anonymous


I think it's time to act like that astronaut and put on a diaper, grab a BB gun, a knife, a steel mallet, pepper spray, rubber tubing, large plastic bags, and six latex gloves and drive 900 miles if nescessary and go after the one you really want!



NUTCASE -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/16/2008 9:27:46 PM)

I am hungry, what should I do?



DeathDealer777 -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/17/2008 2:16:30 AM)

Mike, you can come over and kick it with me... I have a PS3 and the latest Sony LCD [8|]

but back to the topic... Second Coming, is it okay to stalk so called celebritys?... *shrugs* I couldn't think of anything else.

and Artice, what a surprise I love you to!



Second Coming -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/17/2008 7:50:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NUTCASE

I am hungry, what should I do?


have an actual mud pie, like those kids in Haiti are eating.



Second Coming -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/17/2008 7:58:46 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DeathDealer777
but back to the topic... Second Coming, is it okay to stalk so called celebritys?... *shrugs* I couldn't think of anything else.

and Artice, what a surprise I love you to!


sure...I can't think of any celebrity I care enough about to stalk.
you might want to follow the advice I gave to Artie if you decide to do it.
If it's one of those "Hills" girls please do more than just stalk them, make them disappear forever.



NUTCASE -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/19/2008 6:19:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Second Coming

quote:

ORIGINAL: NUTCASE

I am hungry, what should I do?


have an actual mud pie, like those kids in Haiti are eating.

ok....light or dark dirt?  heavy or light water?  crust or no crust, and if so what kind?



Bishop -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/20/2008 3:05:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DeathDealer777

Mike, you can come over and kick it with me... I have a PS3 and the latest Sony LCD [8|]

but back to the topic... Second Coming, is it okay to stalk so called celebritys?... *shrugs* I couldn't think of anything else.

and Artice, what a surprise I love you to!


Do you? Do you really?



Second Coming -> RE: Post here for bad advice (4/21/2008 9:00:35 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NUTCASE

quote:

ORIGINAL: Second Coming

quote:

ORIGINAL: NUTCASE

I am hungry, what should I do?


have an actual mud pie, like those kids in Haiti are eating.

ok....light or dark dirt?  heavy or light water?  crust or no crust, and if so what kind?


You've got to be starving at this point. I don't think you have the time to be picky.



Harlequin -> RE: Post here for bad advice (5/1/2008 7:29:07 PM)

Dear Second Coming,

When it's "that time of the month" I get cranky and hostile, and whenever I walk past

guys at work, they always look scared out of their wits and cross their legs very tightly,

and that only makes me MADDER.

What do I do with all my pent-up, unbridled PMS-induced rage?

Sincerely,

Meg, aka Harlequin, aka "The Merciless Groin Destroyer of the Northeast."



SaronRosse -> RE: Post here for bad advice (5/1/2008 11:34:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Harlequin

Dear Second Coming,

When it's "that time of the month" I get cranky and hostile, and whenever I walk past

guys at work, they always look scared out of their wits and cross their legs very tightly,

and that only makes me MADDER.

What do I do with all my pent-up, unbridled PMS-induced rage?

Sincerely,

Meg, aka Harlequin, aka "The Merciless Groin Destroyer of the Northeast."


I am curious about SC's answer  hahaha



Second Coming -> RE: Post here for bad advice (5/2/2008 8:48:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Harlequin

Dear Second Coming,

When it's "that time of the month" I get cranky and hostile, and whenever I walk past

guys at work, they always look scared out of their wits and cross their legs very tightly,

and that only makes me MADDER.

What do I do with all my pent-up, unbridled PMS-induced rage?

Sincerely,

Meg, aka Harlequin, aka "The Merciless Groin Destroyer of the Northeast."


Groin destroyer huh? Okay I think I have something for you:

Lure one of them into an empty room in the office and get down on your knees. Tell him to close his eyes then unzip his pants. Grab on so tight that it will cut off circulation. Then, yank it like you're startin a lawnmower!



Harlequin -> RE: Post here for bad advice (5/2/2008 9:36:15 PM)

No foreign objects to do lasting damage? I mean, I at least expected a response involving
scissors or a lighter. I'm the groin DESTROYER, not a dominatrix!

Pshh, this is crappy bad advice. [&o]



Second Coming -> RE: Post here for bad advice (5/5/2008 2:35:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Harlequin

I'm the groin DESTROYER, not a dominatrix!


hahahaha I didn't even think of it that way. You're probably right.



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